Woohoo!!

Two weeks off from work. My plan is to see as many movies as possible. I'll try to write some reviews here.

Yesterday, I saw The Golden Compass. It was quiet a beautiful film; the CGI were pretty amazing most of the time. The story was a little convoluted, but interesting. I'm fascinated by the whole "the kid is the hero and can outsmart the adults" genre. It's like a lesson in self-efficacy for kids--letting them know that they won't always be at the mercy of adults and that they can make decisions for themselves.

More to come.

So is it homophobia, or just a clueless sister...

Yesterday for Thanksgiving, we hosted my partner's family dinner. His parents, who are in their 80s (oh, and they are Chinese), have both had health issues recently, so the siblings decided it was better to not have the dinner at their house, where it is traditionally, because they would want to do too much of the work themselves. None of his three siblings wanted to have it at their place, and ours is apparently the most company-friendly. So we were elected.

Some family background to set the stage: Everyone except for his brother and sister-in-law, have been here before for dinners or parties, so that wasn't a big deal. We've been together for almost 10 years and I've been around his family for family functions for about 9 of those years. There has not, however, been any kind of formal acknowledgement from his "traditional" parents of our relationship. They are very nice to me, seem to expect me to be around for any function, and talk about "family" stuff in front of me (in their culture, only family hears about family stuff). So there is a level of acceptance. And his sisters seem fine with it all; his brother and his wife now at least talk to me (he's kind of the redneck of the family, and the sisters have issues with him for other reasons...so it's not like we're missing anything important by not having him on "our side").

So everyone's here and the food's finally ready. Lotus, his "unofficial god mother" decides that Molly (as she usually does) should say the prayer. In my upbringing, it was up to the host to decide when dinner started and who said the prayer. But Lotus is just kind of pushy like that, so no more annoying than usual.

So in her (very Southern Baptist) prayer, Molly thanks "Gary for opening his house to us." Uh, yeah Molly, it's not like I don't own half the house, and was as much involved in "opening the house" as Gary was. Not to mention the fact that I gave up going to see my family in order to help with Gary's family event. It's little things like this that make me wonder how far her "acceptance" of me and my relationship with her brother goes.

Questioning Bloggers

I've been reading blogs of guys who are at various stages of the coming out process. Since I didn't have the option when I was coming out, I'm interested to find out what the blog does for them. It seems that it can be a venue for airing feelings and thoughts, but I wonder if it keeps them from connecting with real people. Part of coming out includes actually getting out and meeting some other gay folks to see how it is to be out. Do the blogs prevent them from doing that sooner than they would without the blog? Just a thought.

Another school year--same worrys

So we've started another school year, and it seems the worrys that I have for students are still the same. I have students with way too much money and way too little motivation. I've got students who should be having the time of their life, but they are suffering from depression or anxiety. And I have students who I believe are in the process of coming out, but I know I if I brought it up, that would be too pushy. So I have to just sit back and wait. I hope that by being open and honest with them, I am giving them the enviornment and opportunity to talk to me when the time is right for them. And then I have the students who, underneath a facade of normalcy, are struggling with family situations that are way more than any 15 or 16 year old should have to deal with. It can be very frustrating at times knowing the things that are going on, but also knowing that there is nothing I can do to make things better for them. So I just keep plugging along.

The Best Spring Break--not so much

So this week I've been off work for Spring Break. But because my partner couldn't get off work, we didn't get to do anything special, although I was supposed to go see my parents. Monday I was very productive getting chores done and I got to the gym too, very early in the day, so there was hardly anyone there (the joys of a small gym). Tuesday I had jury duty--FUN! I was sent with a panel to a courtroom after about an hour of waiting, then we stood in the hall for about 20 minutes. The bailiff then came out and told us the defendant had plea-bargained, so we could leave. However, on my way into the parking garage (they charge you $5.50 to park for jury duty, but pay you $6--how kind), my car had overheated. So I filled it up with some more coolant (when you drive an old car, you carry this kind of stuff with you all the time) and drove straight to my mechanic. He thought it was the thermostat, but said he probably couldn’t get it finished that day. I called my friend John. He and his partner had to go do some shopping, so came and picked me up and I hung out with them for the rest of the afternoon.

The next day (Wednesday), they were going to go to the museum, so I was going to hang out with them again. It rained like crazy and after the museum, we ended up driving through some dangerously high water trying to get to some place for tea and coffee. We chilled for a while for the water to recede. Then they took me to pick up my car. On the way home, it wasn’t running right—missing something fierce.

So Thursday morning, after doing the make-up session with my trainer at the gym (she’d canceled the day before because of the rain), I took the car back to the mechanic. He had one of his workers drive me back home, and then took the car back to the shop. Another day with no car. But by the early afternoon, I was feeling sick—sinus mess, maybe just allergies, but I was feeling feverish and wiped out. I called the shop about 6pm and they said the car was ready. I told them I would pick it up the next morning.

Gary was off on Friday, but I was still not feeling up to speed and some of his co-workers were supposed to come over for pizza that evening. So we had house cleaning to do. About 12:30, Gary dropped me off for the car and then went to do the grocery shopping; I was doing the bank and the cleaners. But—can you guess—the car wasn’t ready! I ended up having to wait about a ½ hour while they finished it up. Grr. But he didn’t charge me for anything this time, even though I think it was a new problem. This is why I go to John (I take care of you) the Greek. And the car runs fine now.

Saturday, I actually got some work done at the house, getting the office and guest rooms reorganized, and then we went out for an old-married-couple’s date: a movie, dinner, home by 9pm. But it was nice and relaxing. But I still have work to do here and grading before school starts back up tomorrow. So that’s what I need to work on today. I need to get back to the gym, now that my legs have recovered from the killer leg workout Melissa put me through on Thursday.

I didn’t get to see my parents because of the car trouble, but my grandmother ended up in the hospital, so I would have just spent time running back and forth to the hospital or hanging out at my parents house with no one there, so that worked out okay. Mamaw fell and has a hairline break in her pelvis, but will be okay after some physical therapy.

So all in all not the spring break I would have hoped for. But whatcha gonna do?

Crappy Customer Service

So what's the deal with people in service industries who don't seem to care about giving good service? Do they not realize that if they don't give good service, people won't come back and they'll soon go out of business? Maybe people have lowered their expectations and so keep using businesses even if they don't provide kind, courteous service. This all comes out of my frustration with having to go to three UPS stores to finally find one that still had a pick-up that day. The first store I could excuse, because they were dealing with two horrible customers and so didn't have time to focus on me yet. But the second store, who I called to ask if they still had a pick up, and then told them I was on my way--to get the "oh, he just left a minute ago" reply when I got there just 12 minutes later?!? I was so pissed off.

And all of this after a long Saturday, of Spring Break, working.

So I needed a movie. I went to see Little Children. I would give it 3 out of 5 stars. The acting was good, and it was pretty, but the character development was lacking. And the trailers made it look like it had a lot more sex in it than it actually did. Even though the lead male was very sexy. My goal is to see at least 5 movies this week. We'll see if that happens.

Just getting started

It was suggested by a friend of mine, who has a blog, that I should start one. So here is a start. We'll see what comes of it.

Today I was reunited with an old friend (we worked together for about a year-and-a-half about 18 years ago). It was fascinating to hear how much she and I have thought about each other over the years. She said some very flattering things about why she remembers me so fondly. I feel very similarly about her, but why is it so awkward to hear things about oneself that are so positive? I found myself doing the whole "oh, stop" thing.


Yesterday I went to see two programs at a local theatre. They were the Academy Award nominees for live action short and animated short. I was thrilled that they released them in this format. These are films that we almost never get to see. And there were some very nicely-made films. Catch them if you get the chance.